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X-Men and the Micronauts #3 (1984, March)

August 23, 2014

Well, I suppose I have to continue this mini, now. Today’s issue, by Claremont, Mantlo and Guice, is “Mine Eyes Have Seen the Gory!”

Mine Eyes Have Seen the Gory!

What a dull, unoriginal cover.

That is, of course, a stupid name for a story. But whatever. Xavier is sleeping, and having nightmates about sending the X-Men into the Microverse. The X-Men are now serving the Entity, along with the Micronauts. Xavier feels the deaths and killing the X-Men are a part of. Karza’s Dog Soldiers surrender, but Kitty thinks they should finish killing them. The Entity shows up, agreeing with Kitty. The Entity kills Rann, and then brings him back, and then he kills the remaining Dog Soldiers. Xavier screams in his sleep, and the New Mutants worry about him. The Entity then destroys the planet and leaves with his servants.

Back on Homeworld, Karza’s concerned about the destruction of the planet, and concerned about his allies. His Chief Scientist, Degrayde (comic books were very subtle back then) is surprised, and even more when Karza orders the Body Banks closed. It turns out Kitty’s still trapped in Karza’s body, but now she’s in control.

Meanwhile, Karza-in-Kitty wakes up, wondering where he is. The Entity hits on “her.” Ew. Ew ew ew. She’s 14, dude. This is the second comic in a row where I’ve had to point out a character being 14 years old. What the hell was wrong with Claremont? And is it still wrong with him? Or has he realized that this shit isn’t right? The X-Men and Micronauts are in a dungeon. Wolverine wakes up first, and knows that they can’t resist the Entity any more. He figures it’d be better for them all to die instead. Colossus stops him, and says dying doesn’t solve anything.

Back on Earth, Dani is tending to Xavier, and he takes over her mind. This allows his astral self to leave his body, and he immediately releases her. In the Microverse, the Entity – who’s definitely putting the moves on a 14-year-old girl – realizes Xavier’s awake, and confronts him on the Astral Plane. Xavier recognizes the Entity’s armour as being identical to what Xavier wore in his battle against Farouk. Karza stabs his body in the back. Xavier manages to capture the Entity’s astral form, and then unmask it. It’s Xavier! Dun dun duuuun! By the way, this means there’s a part of Xavier that wants to have sex with Kitty Pryde. Anyway, the Entity’s victory over Xavier extends his power into the real world, not just the Microverse.

Back in the Microverse, the heroes are trying to find their way out of the sewers. Acroyear starts crying and whining. Bleh. The heroes don’t realize Karza is pointing a gun at them. And the New Mutants don’t realize Xavier’s been taken over by his evil side.

Meh and blah and ew. There’s some reasonably exciting action at the start. There’s some OK characterization throughout the issue. But mostly, it’s just a really weak issue. And Kitty’s body is sexualized way too much. I know I keep harping on this, but she’s 14 years old. How the hell did anyone think it was at all appropriate for her to be laying in just a bra and loincloth while a part of Xavier hits on her? Who thought that was a good idea? Why did no one say, “Uh, hey, maybe this isn’t the way to go, guys”?

The art is OK. Nothing special. Very much the House Style. Doesn’t stand out one way or the other. Which is unfortunate, because great art might have made this a little more enjoyable. Still, it’s hard to think of any artistic changes that could’ve been made, aside from giving Kitty’s body more clothing. The real problems with this story aren’t with the art, it’s with the writing.

Song of the day: Identity Theft by Nellie McKay.

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