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X-Men comics of July 10 2019

July 11, 2019

Follow me on Twitter (@XMenXPert). I finished Jessica Jones season 3. It was OK. Better, I would argue , than season 2. Thematically tighter, at least. Suffered from the same problem as most of the Marvel Netflix shows, in being longer than it needed to be, which resulted in a lot of filler. Hogarth’s sub-plot was the weakest link, as usual. Still, I mostly enjoyed it. But either way, there’s now comics.

Age of X-Man: Apocalypse and the X-Tracts #5, by Tim Seeley, Salva Espin, Israel Silva, and Travis Lanham. Eye-Boy tells the other X-Tracts about seeing Apocalypse meeting with Nate and admitting to sending Evan to die against Omega Red. Unveil then remembers Apocalypse telling her her powers could turn her into the Horseman of War. Apocalypse shows back up, and Eye-Boy punches him.

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“High scorer on Dig-Dug.”

Apocalypse reveals his true form, and it’s fight time. Dazzler blasts Apocalypse’s arm off. Dazzler is so frigging cool. But then he beats the crap out of them while shit-talking them. Colossus accuses him of taking him and Kitty from a life they shared, and Apocalypse lets him know that Kitty left him at the altar.

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Exactly! It was a schoolgirl crush she never got over.

Then Kitty stabs him in the chest with a Menorah. And Apocalypse says that watching Evan taught him love. Meh to that. And this series ends as mediocre as it started. It had potential. It could’ve been an interesting counter-culture story. But it never committed to that, and instead it just kinda meandered along, not doing much of anything. At no point did this mini justify its existence. It was, without any question, the weakest of the Age of X-Man minis.X-Tremists and Prisoner X were both fantastic, Nightcrawler and GeNext were both pretty good, Marvelous was OK, and X-Tracts existed. About the most you can say about it. It was a comic that was published. One with some badass moments for Dazzler.

Giant-Size X-Statix, by Peter Milligan, Michael and Laura Allred, and Nate Piekos. Huh, now that’s interesting. Marvel uses VC for all its lettering, but Piekos is with Blambot Studios. I wonder if that indicates any changes going forward, or if it’s only for this book. I’m guessing it’s just this book, but we’ll have to wait and see. Either way, X-Statix! I’ve started re-reading the old Milligan/Allreds X-Force X-Statix, and man, it is such a weird, brilliant comic. I don’t even want to review this issue, I just want to tell you to read it. It has Edie’s daughter, Katie! The issue where Edie met Katie was so good, so sweet and sad and emotional. I’m so happy to see her get brought back. Dead Girl gives Edie a chance to reveal the truth to Katie, about both her parentage and about being a mutant. Katie doesn’t take it well.

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Damn.

Also, Mr. Sensitive and Vivisector are still alive, having someone escaped death. Neat. Doop and Dead Girl recruit them for a new X-Statix, to stop a new team that perverts what X-Statix stood for. Also, Katie’s boyfriend demonstrates how open-minded he is by saying he once dated a girl with a Coldplay tattoo, and that jokes is amazing and I love it. This comic also introduces Mike Alicar, The A, son of the Anarchist; along with Phatty, the daughter of Phat. There’s also some interesting new antagonists. It’s really good. I’m excited for the X-Cellent launching soon. There’s a couple things I’m concerned about. For one thing, I don’t want Phatty’s body-positivity to be a joke, and there’s a couple bits that have me worried it might go that way. We’ll see. But Milligan’s a great writer, and the Allreds always bring out the absolute best in their collaborators. (I speak of them together, because I genuinely can’t imagine Mike’s pencils coloured by anyone else. Though I can imagine Laura’s colours over someone else’s pencils.) Milligan and the Allreds clearly have some things to say about the state of modern society, and I am here for it. And man, the Allreds are always worth checking out, the art is just so good.

Wolverine & Captain America: Weapon Plus #1, by Ethan Sacks, Diogenes Neves, Adriano Di Benedetto, Federico Blee, and Joe Sabino. Cap’s in his old neighbourhood, and Logan crashes down in Eva, Fantomex’s ship that’s also his nervous system. Looks like Fantomex is dead.

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 Give exposition while you stab. Stabsposition.

They fight dudes while Fantomex’s hologram explains the situation. While a hipster records the fight on his phone. When Cap removes one soldier’s mask, it looks like him. Fantomex explains about Weapon Plus, and how they were inspired by Cap. There’s decades of disappearances of people Fantomex figured were used in experiments. His message leads them to an abandoned lab. There’s a tank holding a dolphin in a cybernetic suit. Another holds a messed-up bear that attacks. I’m taking this as proof that Cyber-Force came from the Weapon Plus program. The next secret facility has a mention of a Weapon XXX, which sounds like the porn parody that I now kiiiiinda want to see. Throughout the issue, there’s glimpses of a guy named Billy who, decades ago, wanted to be the next Captain America so he could fight the Commies. He’s still around. This is a pretty good start to the story. Lays down the important exposition smoothly, uses existing continuity on Weapon Plus to build the story. The fact that there is so much continuity has me wondering how good the story will be, though. More to the point, how original will it be. Is this going to be a story I haven’t read yet? Or is it going to be a retread of existing stories? And the most important question of all: Will Weapon II appear?

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Desperately want Weapon II to show up.

The art is great. Even if the story ends up being lacking – and it’s way too early to tell if that’ll be the case – it’ll at least look good, and that can make up for a lot. Neves’ style fits the story, giving it an action movie vibe. It works well here. Gives it just the right level of tension. I like it.

Secret Warps: Weapon Hex, by Al Ewing, Carlos Villa, Juan Vlasco, Carlos Lopez, and Joe Caramagna. I’m writing about this one for the same reason I wrote about the Weapon Hex two-parter last year: That pun name. Anyway, she fights Mad Ghost and his Android Apes in Siberia.

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A noble goal, really.

He also controls Machine Mandrill, a combination of Machine Man and Mandrill. But the trigger spell kicks in and she loses control and tears it apart. Then she uses a spell to keep Mad Ghost solid, and demands to know why he kidnapped Speed Weasel, who uses that opportunity to show up. And, holy shit, the spell for getting info out of someone is called “Hex Position.” The puns! I love it! Anyway, Dr. Wyndham, Weapon Hex’s father, ordered Red Ghost to capture Speed Weasel and try to kill Weapon Hex. He’s part of the group of villains who’ve teamed up to deal with the heroes. She teleports Soldier Supreme and Ironhammer to her, using a spell called Hex Filtration. Clever. And this might be Soldier Supreme’s first time meeting Speed Weasel? Regardless, he sets up a pretty epic line.

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Awesome.

With them together, the villains attack, but Deathstrique and Dormammu Red fall quickly. He gets Inferno underway. And Weapon Hex uses Hex Terminate, which fails, but it’s another pun name that I very much approve of. Also: Hex-A-Gone, a teleport spell. Is this a good story? Honestly, not really? Is it a fun story? Oh dear gods yes, which is what it was going for. There isn’t really the space to make this a good story. It’s too rushed, and there’s no real depth it. But it’s absurd and ridiculous and full of terrible puns and it’s just loads of fun. It accomplishes exactly what it set out to do, which is to have a bunch of spells that are just punning on the word “Hex.” The whole thing is just fun, and sometimes, that’s all a story actually needs to be.

And the back-up, by Tim Seeley, Bob Quinn, Rachelle Rosenberg, and Joe Caramagna. Laura and Gavrill are in Saint-Esprit, QC, in a little diner, meeting with detective Greer Baptiste.

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I love Gavrill.

Anyway, Laura reveals that she knows Greer ate her partner, Shirlee Cartier. Greer is Wentigra. Laura reveals this riiiiight when Gavrill was about to take a bite of her burger, which is some good trolling from Laura, really. Laura offers to help, Greer says she loves being Wentigra, so Gavrill runs all the diner patrons home.

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Fun panel.

Another fun little story. Lots of Speed Weasel being cute. I love how Seeley portrays the sisterly relationship. Wentigra is also pretty cool. It’s fun.

There’s also Wolverine & Blade, but nah. It’s written by Marc Guggenheim, who is a hack. I flipped through it at the shop, and it looked pretty frigging awful, writing-wise.

And the non-X-stuff.

Ironheart #8, by Eve Ewing, Luciano Vecchio, Geoffo, Matt Milla, and Clayton Cowles. Riri meets Dr. Strange, for information and snarking. My favourite part might be her not wanting to knock on his door. I totally get it. But yeah, their interactions are fun. This is a quiet issue. ONly a very brief fight when she first gets to the Sanctum, over in three pages. It’s mostly just dialogue. But it’s fun.

Champions #7, by Jim Zub, Steven Cummings, Marcio Menyz, and Clayton Cowles. Sam and Kaldera infiltrate Nova HQ to get Sam’s helmet back, and there’s a lot less flirtation between them than I honestly expected. Also, Viv has a feedback error that seems to be her emotional side, and I do want it to lead to Viv becoming more emotional again. It infuriated me what Mark Waid did to Viv, ignoring the hopefulness she had at the end of the Vision solo in favour of her suppressing her emotions. It was insulting to the character, and to fans of the Vision series. I am still mad about it, and anything that gets Viv acting more like a normal teen is fine by me.

From → 2019, Uncategorized

2 Comments
  1. I finally got to pick up some comics this week, and I’ll be catching up on a lot of reading on my week off next week.

    The Weapon Hex comic was great. It expands on the title character a bit, while just being fun.

    Apocalypse and the X-Tracts might just be ok, but that’s still leagues better than the dreadful Uncanny X-Men series.

    I know you normally read every X-Men comic, but skipping Wolverine and Blade sounds like a wise choice with Guggenheim involved.

    • UXM is better-made than X-Tracts, I woulud argue, but it’s also infuriating. X-Tracts was just A Comic That Exists.

      And yeah, I’m getting into a habit of skipping Wolverine comics.

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